Coming at you once more from my living room. The fire is blazing comfortably. The snow outside will probably melt by the end of the week. I was so tired when I got home that I was telling myself "Buck up, K. don't you dare think about calling it a night. you still have stuff to do before you even think about hitting the hay."

Dinner was ready when I walked in the door (THANK GOODNESS) and after I ate, I turned on music while I put away groceries and tidied my room. I washed a load of clothes and hung them to dry. It was Big Brother's turn to do the dishes, and pretty soon we were all singing and dancing around the kitchen. It's amazing what a difference food and good music makes. I feel so much better. Like a new person. Motivation, energy restored.

And that's an example of what I'm grateful this week: hype.

I'm talking about the renewed feeling that happens, after you think all your energy has been drained. The little boost your heart needs to keep going. Maybe it's a text from a friend. Maybe it's an email, whatever. Maybe it's a song you hear and the nostalgia is so thick you can't help but laugh the tension away. Or maybe it's just the straight up hype you get from going to a concert with a bunch of friends.

Whatever, however it comes, you know the feeling. It's like oxygen, isn't it?

It's been an exhausting week. No more exhausting than my life usually is, I guess, but I'm at so many crossroads right now and it mentally taxes me. And if there's one thing that Keira is not good at, it is: taking the first step into the unknown. If I want to do anything with my life, I need to take steps, or JUST DO THE THING ALREADY. (I've already talked about how much Keira dearly loves comfort and safety and everything about staying.)

A friend of mine is really into Need to Breathe, and she's gotten me to listen too. I went to the last night of the #HillsandValleysTour (see photo). One night after work my coworker played a Newsboys song that brought back SO MANY home-school, veggie-tale memories. Each of these things have brought me back, bit by bit, from the edge of freaking out about the end of 2019 and how much I haven't done this year

Sometimes it's good for your brain to forget all the ways you didn't measure up. All the ways you weren't productive. You don't always want to forget where you are and where you're going but when you're exhausted, it's a good thing.

So if you feel a little under the buss tonight, maybe the solution for you is to: eat something, turn on a rockin playlist, and dance until your shoulders lose the tension.

stay strong.
k.